by Cyrus Grant
Tough Mama loves her weed strong, and her munchies abundant. Despite being a gorilla, bananas aren’t the only thing Mama likes to eat when high, so we’re here today to share Tough Mama’s favorite stoner snacks.
We’re hitting cereal first because it’s the ultimate wake ‘n bake choice, and because it’s great morning, day, and night. While the only essentials for cereal are your hands and cereal of choice, making it with milk is a two-for-one, helping with both the munchies AND dry mouth. Mama’s go-to’s:
- Cinnamon Toast Crunch – Not sure if it’s the cinnamon, the sugar, or the hit of nostalgia that comes with a bite of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, but this is the cereal munchie of choice.
- Cocoa Puffs – The trick here is to let the Cocoa Puffs sit in the milk long enough that you get a delicious chocolate milk bonus once you’re done eating.
- Frosted Flakes – This is the cereal of choice if the milk carton is empty. Simple, sweet, and easy to eat with your hands.
Chips (and Puffs)
Chips are an easy pick for some of the best munchies when high. We love the crunch, we love the salt, and we love how damn easy it is to pop open a bag and just go to town. (Kinda like how easy it is to pick up a Tough Mama pre-roll and get super stoned.) You’re definitely going to want a beverage after putting away that family-size bag though. A bunch of weed plus a bunch of salt will leave your mouth dryer than the Mojave Desert. Mama’s chips of choice:
- Flaming Hot Cheetos – Be careful though, putting down a big bag of these babies is a sure-fire way to feel some pain the next day on…uhh the back end.
- Nacho Cheese Doritos – Why make nachos when you can just open a bag of Doritos? Mama says work smarter, not harder.
- Takis – Kind of like a Cheeto and a Dorito hooked up and made a beautiful snack baby. Takis are yet another rolled-up consumable Mama loves.
- Funyuns – What even are Funyuns? Not sure, but they’re delicious when you’re high, so they make the list.
Ice cream is great whether you’re happy, sad, or super-duper stoned. Something about the sweet and cold just hit different when you have weed-induced munchies. While pretty much any ice cream will do, our go-to’s are from Ben & Jerry’s. Partly because they rock, and also because their ice creams kind of sound like weed strains. Mama’s picks:
- Half Baked – Nothing beats Half Baked when we’re full-on baked. Honestly, though, it’s no coincidence that the best ice cream flavor known to mankind is a nod to stoners.
- Phish Food – Named after Phish the band, who have openly shared how cannabis has helped them with the creative process.
- Cherry Garcia – A tribute to Jerry Garcia of the Grateful dead, this ice cream was made to be stoner food.
- Chunky Monkey – It’s banana ice cream, so of course, Mama loves it!
Sometimes the munchies are more of a gorilla-sized hunger, and when that’s the case, we want some actual food to get us right. While any meal or batch of leftovers will work, we’re looking at the best quick fixes to the black hole we have forming in our stomachs. Mama loves:
- California Burritos – Rolled up and full of stuff we love, burritos and joints are both absolute necessities. Mama loves the California burrito with the fries inside to really lock those munchies down.
- Pizza – We always love some pizza, but when the munchies hit, a large turns into a personal size pizza. Get your own slice(s).
- Loaded Fries – The perfect example of how to take something amazing and make it even better. Fries topped with melted cheese and your meat of choice, no brainer.
Let’s be real, fast food is stoner food. Sure, it can be for anyone, but there’s a reason fast food joints are open late and offer literal boxes of food for a few bucks: It’s for us. When Mama wants some food, and she wants it fast, these are the spots:
- In N’ Out – Being in California has countless advantages, one of them being the munchies paradise that is In N’ Out. Mama goes wild for the animal-style burger and fries.
- Taco Bell – Probably a guilty pleasure for many, Taco Bell just has too many top-tier options to pass up. They even have a Nacho Cheese Doritos shell taco – talk about a two-for-one.
- Jack in the Box – They literally have Late Night Munchie Meals. Hmm, wonder who that’s for?
They say never go to the store hungry. Well then we probably shouldn’t go to the store high, but where else would we go for snacks? The grocery store is a magical place, where the cure for munchies sprawls through aisles and aisles. These are the items Mama looks for while roaming the munchies mecca:
- Cheez-Its – There’s definitely a cheese theme going on with a lot of these munchies, so obviously THE cheese cracker was going to make the list.
- Pizza Rolls – There’s nothing like ignoring the directions and dumping as many pizza rolls as possible onto a plate to cure your munchies. Watch out though, these little suckers are full of pure magma fresh out of the microwave.
- Pop-Tarts – Pop ‘em in the toaster…or don’t, the ultimate fast breakfast (or late night) munchie. Mama likes brown sugar cinnamon, but there are like 20 flavors and when you have the munchies, any of them will do.
- Bagel Bites – When you can’t get your hands on some actual pizza, these mini-pizza/mini-bagel hybrids can be the hero we need.
Sometimes getting high gives us the munchies AND major creative energy. When this happens, next-level munchies are born. This is the research and development department of snacking, and while it’s always a discovery in process, these are some of Mama’s favorite creations:
- Pop-Tart ice cream sandwich – So simple, yet so good. Take your favorite Pop-Tart and ice cream flavors, put a couple of scoops between the two Pop-Tarts, and boom — gourmet ice cream sandwich in seconds.
- Doritos super nachos – If just having nacho cheese Doritos doesn’t fill the nacho-sized hole in your stomach, use these Doritos as the base for full-on nachos. We’re talking melted cheese, maybe some bacon crumbles or ground beef, and your seasoning of choice (Mama likes an easy blend of garlic powder, salt, and pepper).
- PB&J milkshake – We love a PB&J sandwich and we love a milkshake, so naturally we love to put them together. Just put some vanilla ice cream, peanut butter, jelly, and a little milk in a blender and you’re set. (If you like a thicker shake, go heavy on the ice cream and light on the milk.)
Did reading this article make you kind of hungry? Us too. So make sure to stock up at the store so you aren’t left with an empty stomach the next time you enjoy one of Tough Mama’s pre-rolls or vape carts!
Oh, and let us know if Mama left out any of your favorite munchies! (And feel free to share any strange concoctions you swear by when you’re high.)